Post by maple on Aug 29, 2010 10:58:45 GMT -5
Once upon a time, there was a dear little girl boy, who was loved by everyone who actually saw him, but was loved most of all by his dearest Grandmother, Nils Olstad, who had an odd Norwegian accent, but Matthew Williams (who some claimed said “eh” too much) had an odd sounding accent too, so it all worked out in the end. There was nothing that Grandmother Nils wouldn’t give little Matthew, when he could actually remember where in the room the boy was standing. Once, he gave Matthew a red cloak hoodie, made of the most comfortable velvet cotton, and it so suited the young boy that he never again wished to take it off. The villagers would joke about the boy’s new look, and so he earned the nickname amongst them of “Little Red Riding Hood”…
…which was perfectly fine in his book because, hell, Matthew was just happy to be seen, even if thebunnyhug hoodie was like a walking bulls-eye target.
One day, Matthew’s mother (who is not important enough or deserving enough for another cameo) called to him and said, “Who are you?”
"I’m CA-NA-D-I mean. I’m Little Red Riding Hood, Mother. You know, your daughter –ugh, I mean son –who runs your silly errands into parts of the woods that I probably shouldn’t be traveling into alone?" The blonde boy quipped with hands stuck deep into the pocket of his red hoodie.
“Oh, right, you,” His mother emphasized with an over-dramatic nod of the head. “Anyway, I have an errand for you to run, through the darkest, evilest part of the woods again.”
“Gosh, why am I not surprised, Mother, eh?”
“Hush your mouth, boy. Take this basket of meat and fish, grain and honey, and beer and mead. Your Grandmother is very ill, and these will do him good,” the woman insisted while handing over a rather weighty basket.
“…mother, you do realize that Grandmother isn’t a Viking celebrating after looting, plundering, and burning a village, right?” Again, the Canadian boy gave his mother a funny look as he accepted the basket onto his arm with a little wince at how heavy it was – Who needed this much food when they were ill anyway? Christ.
“Boy, didn’t I say to hush your mouth?”
The blonde ducked his head. “Y-Yes, Mother… Sorry, eh.”
“I thought so,” the woman huffed and clapped her hands together before proceeding to rub flour from baking off them. “Now, set out before it gets too hot – I know you complain too much when it does, but I would too if I had to wear a hoodie even in the summer just so everyone saw me – and while you are walking, be sure to do so carefully and do not stray from the path. I don’t want your clumsy self to fall and break that bottle of mead. I mean, do you know how hard that stuff is to make now, Little Red?”
“Um, no, Mother. I just usually stick to having a Molson if I’m going to drink.”
“Drinking at your age! Unheard of, child! When you get into Grandma Nils room, make sure you say, ‘Good Morning’ to him, and don’t peek into every corner before you do it! God knows you get distracted enough as is,” the mother continued, now waving a rolling pin around to accentuate her words.
Matthew flinched at the sight and decided, promptly, now might be a good time to leave. “Yes, Mother. I’ll say good morning as soon as I get inside. Promise.”
“Good! And take that mangy bear with you! Don’t know why you insist on having that thing anyway.”
Matthew gave a little roll of indigo eyes and motioned for his white bear-friend, Kumajiro, to follow him. At least he was taking a little bit of protection, unreliable as it was, into the woods. The bear lazily lift it’s white head, blinked beady eyes at his partner, gave an even greater yawn…and finally decided to follow whoever that person was. He could smell food and hoped maybe he would get some. It was worth the walk, anyway.
Little Red, basket weighing down his arm a little more than he had expected it to, began the trek into the dark, scary woods on the edge of town, dimly wondering in his mind why Grandmother insisted on living in there anyway. Maybe it had something to do with keeping trolls… He shrugged his shoulders just the slightest bit and took the step across the threshold, without fear. After all, Matthew figured not even predators in the woods could see him, so how could anything eat him?
Maple Note : And so, I have made the first. I wasn't sure if I should take this semi seriously at first, or not, so it kinda ended up this way. I hope that isn't disappointing to anyone. <3 I also left it pretty open for our Wolfie to come play~
…which was perfectly fine in his book because, hell, Matthew was just happy to be seen, even if the
One day, Matthew’s mother (who is not important enough or deserving enough for another cameo) called to him and said, “Who are you?”
"I’m CA-NA-D-I mean. I’m Little Red Riding Hood, Mother. You know, your daughter –ugh, I mean son –who runs your silly errands into parts of the woods that I probably shouldn’t be traveling into alone?" The blonde boy quipped with hands stuck deep into the pocket of his red hoodie.
“Oh, right, you,” His mother emphasized with an over-dramatic nod of the head. “Anyway, I have an errand for you to run, through the darkest, evilest part of the woods again.”
“Gosh, why am I not surprised, Mother, eh?”
“Hush your mouth, boy. Take this basket of meat and fish, grain and honey, and beer and mead. Your Grandmother is very ill, and these will do him good,” the woman insisted while handing over a rather weighty basket.
“…mother, you do realize that Grandmother isn’t a Viking celebrating after looting, plundering, and burning a village, right?” Again, the Canadian boy gave his mother a funny look as he accepted the basket onto his arm with a little wince at how heavy it was – Who needed this much food when they were ill anyway? Christ.
“Boy, didn’t I say to hush your mouth?”
The blonde ducked his head. “Y-Yes, Mother… Sorry, eh.”
“I thought so,” the woman huffed and clapped her hands together before proceeding to rub flour from baking off them. “Now, set out before it gets too hot – I know you complain too much when it does, but I would too if I had to wear a hoodie even in the summer just so everyone saw me – and while you are walking, be sure to do so carefully and do not stray from the path. I don’t want your clumsy self to fall and break that bottle of mead. I mean, do you know how hard that stuff is to make now, Little Red?”
“Um, no, Mother. I just usually stick to having a Molson if I’m going to drink.”
“Drinking at your age! Unheard of, child! When you get into Grandma Nils room, make sure you say, ‘Good Morning’ to him, and don’t peek into every corner before you do it! God knows you get distracted enough as is,” the mother continued, now waving a rolling pin around to accentuate her words.
Matthew flinched at the sight and decided, promptly, now might be a good time to leave. “Yes, Mother. I’ll say good morning as soon as I get inside. Promise.”
“Good! And take that mangy bear with you! Don’t know why you insist on having that thing anyway.”
Matthew gave a little roll of indigo eyes and motioned for his white bear-friend, Kumajiro, to follow him. At least he was taking a little bit of protection, unreliable as it was, into the woods. The bear lazily lift it’s white head, blinked beady eyes at his partner, gave an even greater yawn…and finally decided to follow whoever that person was. He could smell food and hoped maybe he would get some. It was worth the walk, anyway.
Little Red, basket weighing down his arm a little more than he had expected it to, began the trek into the dark, scary woods on the edge of town, dimly wondering in his mind why Grandmother insisted on living in there anyway. Maybe it had something to do with keeping trolls… He shrugged his shoulders just the slightest bit and took the step across the threshold, without fear. After all, Matthew figured not even predators in the woods could see him, so how could anything eat him?
Maple Note : And so, I have made the first. I wasn't sure if I should take this semi seriously at first, or not, so it kinda ended up this way. I hope that isn't disappointing to anyone. <3 I also left it pretty open for our Wolfie to come play~